Monday, November 6, 2017

This is Safe Sex

“You pick two topics out of the envelope, choose the one you like the most, and then take it to the hallway outside. You will have two minutes to prepare a one-minute speech.” That’s what I told my college students, and though they groaned a little at the prospect initially, they actually enjoyed it, especially once their turn was done and they could watch and enjoy what the others came up with for their topics. In fact, when the round was over, several wanted to do a second impromptu speech! Then it was my turn. At their insistence, I had told them that they could choose a topic for me, any topic, and I would have to speak for a minute without preparation. One of my classes chose “the migration patterns of the Alaskan moose” for my topic. Well, what can I say? I know absolutely nothing about the creature, except that it is huge. So I went for humor and talked about how important it is to miss a migrating moose with your Miata. It could ruin your whole day, otherwise.

Another class had a ball picking the topic they wanted me to speak about. I could hear them howling with laughter as I waited five minutes in the hallway for the big announcement. Finally I was ushered into the classroom. “Professor Fox,” one of the most energetic students said with a wicked grin, “we want you to speak about safe sex.”

I smiled as I approached the front of the room and stood behind the podium, praying that I would not waste this opportunity to speak to such an important topic. I started by saying, “Sex is a wonderful creation of God. It was his idea, and he gave it as a gift to husbands and wives to increase joy and intimacy in marriage. It deepens the love they have for each other, it builds trust and tenderness, and of course, it can produce life. There is nothing perhaps better, on this side of heaven, than loving sex in marriage. And of course, that is where sex is safe, and the place for which it is created: marriage. When it is used outside of the bounds of marriage, sex can be destructive. It is like a fire. When you have a fire in the fireplace, it is a wonderful thing. It warms the house, and produces ambience and joy. But when the fire is in the living room, on the rug and in the couch, it brings destruction, fear, and great loss.”

I closed by saying that I know these ideas may seem antiquated to them, and impractical, because sex is viewed by most as an entitlement. We have grown much more permissive as a society in our attitudes toward sex, with more than 60 percent of millennials believing sex before marriage is “not wrong at all.” But if we really want to practice sex that is safe, we will be willing to wait until marriage for it.

I know that the world says we Christians have our heads in the sand when it comes to sex. And that we need to be preaching to those who choose to pursue sex outside of marriage that they must do so in a way that prevents disease or pregnancy. I get it. But implicit in that message, and becoming more explicit every day, is the proposition that sex is amoral, that it is simply a bodily function, like sneezing. I don’t apologize for presenting the other side of the argument, appealing to young people who are living in a sex-saturated culture, that there really is a way for sex to be safe. And good.

When I finished my speech, the students gave me a hearty ovation, and some made comments to me as they were leaving. One senior said, “Hey, that was awesome. Great job.”

I left the classroom thankful that I was able to share just 60 seconds of encouragement with young people I have grown to love and care about.

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